[Moderated by Matt Jones]
I’m sure most of you have heard by now, but President Eli Capilouto has sent out an e-mail saying that classes next week will go on as scheduled no matter what happens in the Final Four. Here’s my reply:
Dear decision makers at the University of Kentucky,
I’m writing about your apparent lack of understanding of how much the possibility of winning the men’s basketball championship really means to the student body. From what I understand, classes will be scheduled as normal next week regardless of how the Wildcats do in the tournament this weekend. I think I speak for every current, former and future student at the University of Kentucky when I say that this is completely unacceptable.
There are countless reasons why having class the day of/day after the title game (if we make it) is a bad idea. I would love to write about all of them, but this post has to go up at 8:00 tonight and my computer’s battery life isn’t that great. Due to the circumstances, I have put together a condensed list of my top reasons not to have class on Tuesday if we win.
First of all, I can confidently say that if UK wins the national championship, attendance in class the following day will be no higher than 10% of however many students are enrolled. Think about that. If a class has 45 kids in it, then only four and a half kids will show up AT BEST. Do you really want half a student strolling into class 10 minutes late? Of course not, it would make a mess. The well-being of our students is supposed to be a top priority at UK. Having class next week could be downright dangerous for every student taking a class with an enrollment of a number not divisible by 10.
Secondly, nothing good will happen academically next week if we win. The few students that will go to class on Tuesday (bless their hearts) will certainly be in no shape to do anything productive that day. A handful of kids who haven’t been to sleep in 48 hours have no business being anywhere near a college classroom. Matt Jones said it best today when he tweeted, “Here is reality…whatever you teach in your class will be forgotten next week. The students will remember the Final Four for a lifetime”. The bottom line is that if UK is in the title game Monday night, no one will be studying for whatever class work they have due on Tuesday. The library will be the quietest place on campus.
And finally, classes need to be canceled for the professors. The lack of students in class combined with their lack of a mental capacity equals a colossal waste of time for every professor on campus. It’s pretty hard to teach a bunch of students that aren’t there. And then what are they going to do when the test comes around, fail the 90% of students that didn’t show up that day? Out of the question. Also, let’s stop pretending that the great staff at UK doesn’t want to stay up late Monday celebrating a championship and sleep in Tuesday dealing with the aftermath. Canceling class next week is a win-win situation for everyone involved.
Think about it Mr. Prez,
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